Ranking the NFL’s 1-2 Teams; Nolan Rules!

After watching my beloved Oakland Raiders get manhandled by Peyton Manning and the Broncos last night (and lose QB Terrell Pryor to a concussion in the process), I thought it was time to rank the eleven 1-2 teams in the NFL, since that’s the only place my Raiders fit in.

11. Arizona Cardinals: In Carson Palmer I don’t believe. The Cards have zero running game and an offensive line that has allowed nine sacks and 21 QB hits already. Carson Palmer’s brittle bones won’t last the season at this rate.

10. Cleveland Browns: I  know they just handed the Vikings their third straight loss to start the season, but I’m not sold on them. They’re only averaging 15.7 ppg and I can’t see their defense being this good for the whole season. Oh, and they traded away Trent Richardson.

9. Oakland Raiders: It pains me to put them here but they play in the AFC West with two 3-0 teams that look for real. Not good for the Silver and Black. And they only beat Jacksonville 19-9 in the Black Hole.

8. St. Louis Rams: Everyone always says they’re getting better, they’re closer to being a good football team. No. Their defense is a sieve despite their offense having some young, exciting playmakers.

7. Carolina Panthers: Coming off a blowout win over the hapless Giants, the Panthers look like a team ready to make a run–a solid defense (12 ppg) and two losses by a combined six points leads me to believe in them. Slightly.

6. Buffalo Bills: They should have beaten the Patriots and snuck by Carolina with a last-second TD pass from rookie QB EJ Manuel. Not to mention the two-headed RB monster of CJ Spiller and Fred Jackson.

5. San Diego Chargers: They just can’t seem to close out games otherwise they’d be 3-0. Philip Rivers hasn’t really turned it over (1 INT) as often as Philip Rivers tends to do, so there is some hope in sunny San Diego.

4. Philadelphia Eagles: Talk about a riches to rags story. After the first half of their demolition of Washington in Week 1, the Birds have lacked the buzz new coach Chip Kelly created. They’ve got big play capability on offense with Michael Vick, LeSean McCoy and DeSean Jackson but you can’t let up four TD’s a game and expect to win a lot of games.

3. San Francisco 49ers: Weren’t they just in the Super Bowl? They got pumped by the Colts at home and QB Colin Kaepernick seems human all of a sudden. Maybe he did eat Flacco’s chicken wings! And Alden Smith is a drunk.

2. Green Bay Packers: Aaron Rodgers is averaging 352 yards a game and they’re 1-2? He’s also been sacked 10 times, so they need to find a way to keep #12 upright. Oh, and their defense allows over 29 points too. Shootouts all year!

1. Atlanta Falcons: They lost two tight games on the road. Matt Ryan is still very good but their running game is almost non-existent (90 ypg). With their next three games in Atlanta (with a bye mixed in), I think they’re in the best shape of any 1-2 team.

That’s my breakdown of the 1-2 teams in the NFL–a motley crew, but one that features some of the most talented teams in the league.

In non-NFL news, Nolan has almost mastered the potty training thing when he’s awake. We still put him in a diaper for nap and sleep and have to convince him to use the potty to go to the bathroom, but he seems to enjoy it. Buying in is half the battle, right?

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